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I'm worried if I give up drinking I'll replace it with...

 

No, I haven't met Mr. right but I have met Mr. Douchbag,...

 

They say laughter is the best medicine…. I think...

 

I'm so happy I could shit rainbows.

 

A good sister will wipe your tears away... A great sister...

 

By the shit you're talking, you haven't figured out...

 

I'm a lady. With the vocabulary of a well educated sailor.

 

I do not spew profanities. I enunciate them clearly like a...

 

I want someone to look at me the way I look at chocolate cake.

 

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine you make me hap...nah,...

 

That's how I roll. Ladylike with a wad of bitch in my back...

 

Life is not a fairy tale. If you lose your shoe at midnight,...

 
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