Me? Jealous of you?
Bless your little
delusional heart.
My liver hates our Friendship.
I knew we would be best friends
when you listened to all
of...
Drama doesn't just walk
into your life. You must
create...
I can be your best friend until
you piss me off, then I'll...
Back off, asshole.
I have a best friend and
I'm not afraid...
We will be the old bitches
in the nursing home
causing...
|
Keep rolling your eyes, bitch.
Maybe you'll find a brain...
Your secrets are safe with me,
I zoned out about 30 minutes ago.
Tell me all about your
religious and political
views....
We are just like fat thighs, we will
always stick together.
Our superpowers are
drinking wine and
judging people.
You're my best friend, with a vagina!
You bring the friendship I'll
bring the benefits.
|
Oh I'm sorry, I thought
friendship worked both
ways. I...
Good friends will talk about
their sex lives. Best friends...
Mess with me, bad idea,
mess with my best friend,
really,...
You'll be my best friend forever,
Well... unless you get...
You are ridiculous, inappropriate
offensive and hilarious....
How many bowls of Bitchflakes
did you have this morning?
I'll return your call about this
weekend as soon as I...
|
If I were a pimp daddy you'd
be my #1 hoe because
I respect...
That confused feeling you get when you drunk call your friends...
I know we will be best friends
forever. We're too lazy
to...
You are like my favorite bra,
comfy and supportive but still...
Aawwww... I see you're back to
being pleasant again,
to...
You don't have to be
crazy to be my friend.
But it helps.
Thanks for all the unsolicited
parenting advice, especially...
|
