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I like running because I really, really, really, really like...

 

Everyone is all drama over Pacers Vs Heat and I'm over...

 

I'm not cheating... I'm just changing some rules.

 

Unlike the Super Bowl, my blackouts are brought to you by...

 

Good Game Good Game Good Game I Hate You Good...

 

If someone gets on the treadmill next to me, I mentally...

 

You look so cool walking around the gym staring at yourself...

 

May your enjoyment of the Super Bowl not be affected by...

 

Got up to 40 minutes on the exercise bike! Next week I'm...

 

Ohhh, my constant posts about working out are annoying?...

 

Dear people at the Gym, Just because you're wearing...

 

I used to hit the gym when I was stressed. Now I just hit...

 

I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain...

 

New NFL rule. You can catch the ball by catching the guy...

 

They should make an app that tells me how many Oreos I can...

 

I love it when I run because my thighs constantly clap and...

 

I do yoga to relieve stress. Just kidding, I drink wine.

 

I'm inviting you to watch the Super Bowl with me at your...

 

I love my six pack so much, I protect it with a layer of fat.

 

Please tell me more about your cat and your recent breakup,...

 

I ran 3 miles this morning, so if I did my math correctly,...

 

I just took the weirdest dump! It looks just like your...

 

Of course I'm in shape. My shape is round.

 

Unless you fell off the treadmill and smacked your face,...

 

My cardio is shopping.

 

It's the Holiday Season.... Don't forget to set your...

 

I don't always talk to people at the gym, but when I do, I...

 

I wouldn't be caught dead in a damn track suit unless it...

 
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