Wanna come over
and watch porn
on my 60 inch
flat screen...
I don't want to brag or make
anyone jealous but....
I can...
You're living proof that
reincarnation does exist.
No one...
Let's role play...
I'll be Burger King and
You be...
I really love how we can just look at each other and know that...
Is that a phone in your
back pocket? because that
ass is...
Men used to say "Why marry the cow when the milk is free"?...
|
F**k you and the
horse you rode in on.
Just kidding,
the...
I'm just a Cupcake looking
for a Stud Muffin.
Every morning I long to hold you,
I need you, I want you,...
How many calories does
avoiding eye contact burn?
You are a big scoop of
awesomeness, sprinkled
with bad ass...
Every time I think of you I
get butterflies in my stomach....
I bet you're wondering what I'm
thinking as I stand here,...
|
I'm not a sarcastic bitch
all the time, sometimes
I'm...
Your teeth a very unique. They remind of a song called "Black...
There are only two absolutes in life: Friends and Vodka. And...
Are you always this stupid?
Or are you putting in a special...
I don't hate you because of
your race, sex, age or
sexual...
Opportunity may only knock once,
but temptation leans on the...
I love you so much, that you
can poop at my house
with the...
|
It's been too long since
we threw up on each other.
Facebook needs a "Wow, that's the dumbest GOD DAMN
thing...
When I want your opinion,
I'll remove the damn duct tape.
It's the little things in life,
that remind me of
your penis!
Please be aware that,
4 of the 5 voices in my
head are...
They should make toilet seats with a rumble pack to shake your...
Life is hard...
It's harder if you're stupid.
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