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You are my sunshine, my only sunshine you make me hap...nah,...

 

That's how I roll. Ladylike with a wad of bitch in my back...

 

It Ain't Gonna Spank Itself...

 

Life is not a fairy tale. If you lose your shoe at midnight,...

 

I'm a proud supporter of messy hair and sweatpants.

 

Dear Bitter Bitch, Please do us all a favor and stop...

 

I'm sorry I slapped you, but you didn't seem like you would...

 

Facebook reminds me of going to a public restroom... You...

 

Let's not put a label on our relationship. Let's just...

 

I farted....That is as close to me giving a shit as you're...

 

You think you can out-bitch me? Oh honey, you still got your...

 

If I can make at least one person smile, or pee their pants...