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Check out the NEW Rottenecards Blog - Funny, Bizarre and Shocking Posts!

Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it...

 

The difference between pizza and your opinion is... I...

 

Don't get mad when your ex has someone new... We were...

 

Find a guy who ruins your lipstick, not your mascara.

 

Big girl panties?? Hell I put on combat boots and go commando!

 

Oh sweetie, I don't hate you. That would require effort and...

 

A friend is someone you can call when you wake up covered...

 

My idea of a balanced diet is a cookie in each hand!

 

They say there's more fish in the sea... I just Keep...

 

As your best friend, I swear to always pretend to be your...

 

I don't usually drink alcohol from a coffee mug, but when...

 

A girl can't live on wine and tea alone. We also need the...

 

I would rather cuddle then have sex. If you're good...

 

How do you like your eggs? In an Easter basket with...

 

Oh bless your little heart, you think I waste my time...

 


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